Heartburn, Hangovers, and Heartbreak

This post could also be called "what I learned in my 20's." When I think about those wonderful "early adult" years those are the three words I come up with. Heartburn, Hangovers and Heartbreak. There maybe some other stuff, but mostly that is what I think of when I think of my 20's.

The first time I got heartburn, I thought I was dying. I was 28 and kept trying to convince myself that I was too young for a heart attack as I drove myself to the ER to have them save me form the horrible pain in my chest. The ER staff hooked me up to all sorts of monitors only to discover that my blood pressure was "slightly raised" (probably due to the pain) and then they sent me home to
suffer  and die alone. By the time Agent Daddy ( who was still just Agent Hot Stuff) got home I was sure that this would be our last night together. I tearfully told him I loved him and that he should marry again. He calmly asked if I had seen a doctor. When I told him about the horrible people at the ER who sent me home to suffer and die, he could barely suppress his snort. As with almost everything Agent Daddy is my voice of reason. He calmly explained that the hospital would not have sent me home to die and that maybe the pain would go away if he rubbed my back. It must have worked because I woke up the next morning. I was alive and no more pain. I had no idea what had happened but my wonderful husband had done what the evil ER had not and that was make the pain go away. After about six months of these "episodes" I was finally diagnosed with acid reflux. Thank God for Agent Hot Stuff/Daddy.

And then there was the morning I discovered hangovers. When I first started drinking when I was (cough) 21. I never got hangovers. I drank, went to bed and woke up fresh as a daisy, until the day that I didn't. Again I was sure I was dying. I must have the worst flu EVER! I just wanted to sleep and not hear anything until the pounding in my head went away. but I was at my girlfriends house when this wondrous occurrence happened. Well you didn't think I partied alone did you? So I open my eyes and the sunlight burns my eyeballs and sears my brain with it toxic light. I groan and attempt to open my eyes again. When the room comes into focus I am confused. I am not sure I know where I am...or how I got there. Then I see Julia. Phew, I know this person. I guess I am okay. So I sat up. Do you know what a bad idea that can be? The room began to spin I started to feel nauseous. I closed my eyes and returned to the lying down position. Then I heard it. Like a screeching banshee from hell was that bird chirping outside the window. I began to silently plead that the bird would shut up. I must have groaned because Julia asked if I was okay. I probably groaned again. We had to get up and be somewhere. Where ? I don't remember. I just remember forcing my aching head up off the pillow and going to the bathroom. I showered but that didn't help. Finally Julia's mom promised me the cure for hangovers. I was desperate by this time so I drank it. And promptly puked it right back up into the kitchen sink. Wholly cow it was awful. But I did feel a little better after puking so I guess it was a cure. Not one I would ever take again but it did work.

And well finally, heartbreak. Until I found Agent Daddy I had my hear broken so many times. I think that is just part of being in your 20's. But I will say without all the heartbreak I would not have nearly appreciated Agent Daddy for the prince he is.