The Dead Guy- Chapter 7

I Can't believe I ate the WHOLE thing!

Officer Yumm, I mean Thad ( must keep reminding myself to call him Thad), took me to this wonderful little mom and pop Mediterranean restaurant. The tables were small.The room was noisy but the food was heaven on a plate. He asked if he could order for both of us and I agreed. I mean I was on my first date in almost 20 years. What did I have to lose? Thad ordered around 10 appetizers and proceeded to beg me to 'try a little" of each one. A big man like Thad consumes a lot of food because his body burns a lot of calories. I, however, sit on my butt all day and am tiny by comparison. I do not eat alot of food and this was A LOT of food. The food was amazing. Each time I took a bite I was in love with a new flavor.. Thad seemed to enjoy watching me fall in love with each morsel of food.


"One more bite." he would say. " You haven't tried this one yet." And I would take a bite and my eyes would roll back in my head from pleasure.
Finally he asked " So do you want to try some baklava for dessert?'
"Are you trying to kill me?" I asked " I am so stuffed now I don't think I can walk"
"Would you like me to carry you back to the car?"
"Oh that would be great. Except with my luck someone would see us then tell my mom. Then I would have to explain why a police officer was carrying her daughter out of a restaurant. My mom could put the Spanish inquisition to shame. She would not believe I ate too much. She would be sure that I was not telling her that I was dying and  you had to carry me to the hospital."
Thad just smiled."You have a very vivid imagination."
"I am just relaying what would happen to me based on historical events."
"Have you ever been carried out of a restaurant before?"
"Do I have to answer that? I don't think you read me my rights yet. No I don't think I will answer that."
Thad threw his head back and laughed. "There is never a dull moment with you is there?" He took my hand and we walked back out to his truck. He opened my door for me (What a gentleman) and I got inside. He ran around the front of the truck and slid in next to me. He started the engine and asked "King or Queen?"
"King or Queen what?"
"Bed."
"Bed?"
"Do you have a King or a Queen sized bed?"
I just stared at him. I mean I have had some pretty vivid fantasies about this man and a bed but I was a little confused what the size of the bed had to do with what I was thinking. And really I was not sleeping with this guy on the first date anyway."Uh," I began brilliantly "King? What exactly are we talking about here. I am a little lost. Is this your idea of foreplay?"
Thad laughed. And Laughed. And then Laughed some more. Every time he turned and looked at me he would start laughing again. Tears started to stream from his eyes. I was starting to get a little miffed. I mean  if he didn't want to sleep with me that was okay. I mean sort of. Well you know not today but was the idea really so impossibly funny?
Thad finally got a hold of himself turned to me and said "If there is any foreplay going on with me you will be crystal clear about it. Okay? Now, I have a truck, as you may have noticed. You no longer have a bed. Remember, you told Crime scene they could have it? You would never sleep in it again? Your house has been released and I figured that you would want to sleep in your own house tonight. Which you cannot do without...."
"A Bed" I finished. I could feel the heat  burning my cheeks. He was trying to be nice. I was not so used to nice from people I wasn't related to. Or had been married to. Once you divorce, every man you know seems to think you "need it bad" because you know... all divorcees do. The last two years I had been hit on in the crudest ways imaginable. By people I thought were friends of my ex husband. My mind has become trained to jump to the worst conclusions and here I had done it and I was wrong. I was shamed. So I said "Thank you. That is really sweet. Totally unnecessary. But very sweet."
"Where are you sleeping tonight?"
"I don't know yet."
"So I guess it is neccessary that we take you to get a bed. They can put it in the back of my truck and I can deliver it and have you back in time to pick up your kids from school."
"Thank you." I said again. " You really are very sweet...when you are not grilling me about a dead guy."
"And you are very welcome." He said as we pulled up in front of the local mattress store. "Lets go get you a bed." He turned off the truck and got out. I was opening the door when he reached it and held it open for me. "I am going to open the store door for you as well. Please don't fight me on this." He said. I nodded my agreement. It really was nice to be treated like a lady.

The sales person greeted us as soon as we walked through the door. "Well hello! I am Brad. How are you doing today." The sales person was a middle aged bald man. He had thick framed hipster glasses and a big meaty hand that gripped each of ours like he was ready for us to be pulled away. He pumped each of our hands and asked "Are you looking to buy a bed today?" I looked around. There was nothing but beds on the show room floor. I was thinking that it was a pretty safe bet that we were there for a bed. Before I could let my snarky fly, Thad answered " The lady needs a new bed. We want one in stock and want to take it with us when we leave here."
"What size are you looking for." He asked. All I could think about was the hysterical laughter of the car. I glanced over at Thad and he winked.
" I want a King sized bed." I ansered
"Firm? Pillow top? Ajustable?"
"Pillow top. Thank you."
"Right this way" Brad led us to the front of the store. Right in the picture window facing the street.
"This is our most popular model" Brad pointed to the one we had arrived at. "Why don't you lay down and try it out."
"I sat on the edge of the bed. It felt fine.
'Go ahead lay down. Get a real feel."
I started to giggle, I looked at Thad and he was pressing his lips together trying not to laugh. I laid down full length on the mattress. It was fine but I always want to try all of the possibilities out before I buy. "Very nice." I said to the ceiling. Are there any more styles like this?" I sat up and looked at Brad.
"Yes the ones on either side of this one are pillow tops as well." So I went from bed to bed laying down on my back, on my side, on my other side until I had tried them all.
"Well?" Thad asked
" I usually have the dog and or the boys in bed too. Can you both get in bed with me? So I can see if there is enough room for us all?" Brad and Thad looked at each other, then at me. Brad shrugged and got into the opposite side of the one I was sitting on.
"Are you on the edge or in the middle?" Thad asked?
"Middle usually" I scooted over and he got in beside me. I was now laying in a bed in a picture window with a man on either side of me. On the main street. Thad was a big guy but the twins were not small any more either. And who knew if those two were done growing yet. " I think I will take this one." I said sitting up between the two men. Brad got up and said "Great. Follow me to my desk and I will get you written up. " Thad snagged my hand as I tried to slide across the be to get out. I turned and he planted on on me. It was quick but wow. I felt the heat from his lips and a little zing of electricity all trough my body.  He let go of my hand and got up. "Just wanted you to be clear about my intentions." He said. I just sat there with my jaw hanging open. I hope drool wasn't' coming out. It took a couple minutes for me to collect myself and get out of bed. Thad waited patiently and then placed his hand at the small of my back and we headed to Brad's desk.     
When we arrived at his desk he looked up and asked, "Mattress and box-springs, do you need a frame?"
"No just the mattress and box-springs  Thanks." I answered. Brad typed on the computer. He asked my name, address and telephone number then hit print. The printer whurred away and he turned and said "1679.65 with tax."
I took out my debit card and he swiped it. Then he said " I will call the guys in the back to get it ready for you. Just drive around the side of the building." He pulled the credit slip from the machine. He took a pen and handed them both to me. I signed it and handed it back. " Hand them this ..." He stapled the receipt to the invoice "and they will load it into your truck."
I took the receipt and turned. Thad put his hand on my elbow and steered me towards the door. He leaned in and said softly in my ear "You taste good."
I shook my head but said nothing. I wanted to ask him to kiss me again. Slower. Longer. But I was too afraid. Too afraid that maybe he wouldn't like the second as much as I liked the first.

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